Chicago Python User Group Goes Ninja

Here is the official announcement for the Chicago Python User Group (chipy). The important thing to notice here is that I'll be presenting (or maybe the important thing is the free pizza.)

Chicago Python User Group
=========================

Calling all Chicago Python Ninja's, this will be our best meeting yet--
this Thursday. (if not, there will be some pretty darn good pizza in
here)

Insert funny comic here:

We have some interesting dragon slaying talks lined up this month.
Starting off, Garrett will mix theory with practice in another one of
his highly thought provoking talks. Professor DiPierro will go all
out with the tools that serve as his student's weapons in the real
world. Josh will brave the Python waters as n00b who comes from the
dark side and will probably tell us a interesting Ninja story while
displaying Pythonic charm and charism--all while balancing on one
leg ;) Do not try this at home. In fact, staying home will not be as
much fun or as educational, folks.

This *will* be our best meeting yet.

Topics
------

* Bazaar within Subversion, Personal Workflow - Garrett Smith
* T2 (web2py tier two) and T3 - Massimo DiPierro
* Beginning Python with AppEngine - Josh Cronemeyer

NOTE: Due to the high level of interest in various talks, I have
limited talk length to 25-30 min. Offenders will be severely punished
by my personal Ninja friend.

When
----

Thursday, December 11th, 6:30pm Pizza
Thursday, December 11th, ~ 7pm Meeting

Location
--------

ThoughtWorks, 200 E. Randolph 25th floor.

Prepare to be perfectly astounded by my one legged python slinging, pizza eating acrobatics. I'm going to announce the deployment of the best web application ever at the best python meeting ever. It will be cosmic. A total eclipse of dynamic languages.

A history of the security at the Aon Center

The AON security ninjas... Should I start from the beginning? Yes? Ok. It is a looong story about ancient Japan. Two warring feudal lords loved the same woman, Iwasaki. Both lords tried to win Iwasaki over with the traditional Japanese gift of love: wooden clogs inlaid with a jade Hello Kitty. Then, on the day Iwasaki was to choose which lord to marry she died tragically of a hangnail caused by poorly fitted clogs. Each of the lords blamed the other for her death and the bitter conflict that ensued instigated centuries of assassination and espionage. Long after both sides of the conflict were all killed the clans of ninjas that were involved, known as the Iwasaki ninjas, swore their allegiance to Iwasaki's family. The family became wealthy and powerful, but during the 19th century the head of the Iwasaki family lost an epic game of flip cup to a young John D. Rockefeller. The dishonor was so great that afterwords the allegiance of the Iwasaki ninjas transferred to Rockefeller. The ninjas were the secret of Rockefeller's success and they lived in his mansion until Rockefeller's death. Suddenly in need of a place to live, and being preferred shareholders in Standard Oil, they took over the newly constructed Standard Oil building in Chicago. There they assumed responsibility for building security.

Forty years later their only allegiance is to the building and their union, the Local Ninjitsu 393. If you visit, pay attention to the dozens of large gongs that line the walls. Each gong represents a generation of Iwasaki ninjas. DO NOT TOUCH THE GONGS! A visiting member of the Chicago Ruby User Group named Josh once rang a gong. Later that evening he swallowed his own tongue under mysterious circumstances while giving a talk about metaprogramming in ActiveRecord. Detectives later found that one of his note cards had been altered to say:

I need not your needles, they're needless to me;
For kneading of noodles, 'twere needless, you see;
But did my neat knickers but need to be kneed,
I then should have need of your ninjas indeed.

The murder remains unsolved. Frankly, for most of us in the meeting that notecard was the only part of his talk that made sense, but you know, metaprogramming is hard. The guiness book of world records lists that paragraph as the most deadly tongue twister known to man. It is also worth mentioning that ever since that day the poor fellow has been known in the Ruby community as "Because, the unlucky stiff".